Quacktitioner Alert (5)

A reader points out to me that home obstetric deliveries will soon be as safe as hospital deliveries.

Has Patricia Hewitt secretly funded obstetric flying squads for the whole country?

Sadly not.

This is another Quacktitioner Alert.

“Scotland on Sunday” reports:

SCOTTISH midwives are being trained to perform potentially dangerous forceps deliveries in a bid to tackle a chronic shortage of specialist doctors. Health bosses in Aberdeen are creating a new type of medical staff called "assisted birth practitioners" in an attempt to reduce the lengthy waits mothers can face before being seen by obstetricians during labour. The Scottish Executive last night confirmed the pilot could be rolled out across Scotland. But according to managers behind the project, the move has met with resistance from midwives.

The new practitioners will be trained to use forceps and carry out ventouse procedures to deliver babies, procedures previously only carried out by highly trained doctors. The move has been heavily criticised by maternity campaigners who fear it is an attempt to deliver specialist maternity cover on the cheap and could see the number of forceps deliveries, a risky and potentially traumatic procedure, soar in Scotland.

Forceps deliveries can often lead to injuries including cuts and bruises to both the baby and mother. If used wrongly, babies can be left with broken bones and even brain damage. Currently there are five midwives in Elgin, four in Aberdeen and two in Orkney taking the two-year course in a joint venture with Bradford University to take up the new assisted birth practitioner role. On top of assisting delivery they will also be taught how to take foetal blood samples from the baby to monitor during labour. Organisers behind the scheme claim the new practitioners will provide an invaluable service in remote areas where obstetricians are in short supply.

"In the right hands, these procedures are perfectly safe," said Jean McConville, clinical midwifery manager at Aberdeen Maternity Unit, who is leading the project. "We have midwives with more than 20 years of experience and have witnessed dozens of forceps deliveries who are now being trained to carry them out."

Read the whole, horrifying article here. It demonstrates all the characteristic Crippen hall marks of “dumbing down”.

"...it is an attempt to deliver specialist maternity cover on the cheap."

It saves money.

Madwives are not competent to carry out these procedures. So we had better rebadge them so that no one notices. They are going to be called “Assisted Birth Practitioners.” That’s all right then. Sounds good. The title does not mean anything, but it sounds important. We know about this. Once again it is Hospital at Night with Sue and Dave. Jean McConville, the head honcho madwife says:

"We have midwives with more than 20 years of experience and have witnessed dozens of forceps deliveries who are now being trained to carry them out."

Quite so.

She has read and is quoting from Dr Crippen’s comment on the plan to allow air hostesses to fly aeroplanes:

"There is a critical shortage of qualified pilots. It takes many years to train a pilot to fly a modern jumbo jet and the expense of this training is enormous. We have a body of young men and women, all keen to help out and fill the gaps. These young people have been serving food and drinks to the passengers for many years, and are valuable members of the Air Crew Team. Given their years of experience it is only economic sense to make more use of them on the flight deck. They have been watching the pilots fly the planes for years, and will have no difficulty in taking over from them in certain controlled circumstances."

Tracey Smith, an air hostess for nine years said, "I am very excited about this move and look forward to working with my pilot colleagues." (Full article here)

Soon it will not be just over-promoted trolley-dollies. Dr Crippen revealed here that nurses are to have an important role to play in the front line of the RAF.

Supreme Commander of the Allied Tactical Air Unit, Staff Nurse Mandy Watkins, said:

“Nurses truly have an important, exciting and innovative role to play in modern air warfare. We have introduced a holistic approach to the carpet bombing of civilians, and we have highlighted the fact that the opinions of the bombees, or ‘clients’ as we call them, and their families are vital in the planning of an effective integrated bombing pathway”.

When is this going to stop?